Finding people who understand what you're going through

You tell a friend that your mum rang four times before lunch, and they laugh and say theirs does that too, and you can't find a way to explain that it isn't the same thing. When the people closest to you don't quite get it, caring can start to feel like something you do on your own. This is information, not medical advice. It names no particular groups or services, because what help exists for carers, and how to reach it, varies from one area to another. Instead, it describes the kinds of support that are out there and how people find them.

Know what kinds of support exist

Some carers' charities offer services such as support groups, counselling and information. Groups may meet in person or online. Mind, writing about peer support in general, says online support can be helpful because it is often free and easy to join, and adds that you might prefer to meet face to face. Alzheimer's Society in the UK describes counselling as one kind of talking therapy, in which you talk with a trained professional about your thoughts and feelings.

Hear what people say they get from it

MedlinePlus Magazine, from the US National Institutes of Health, says caregiver support groups can be a great way to talk about your experience with people who understand what you are living through. Alzheimer's Society in the UK says it can also help to speak to people in a similar situation, and that at groups you can talk with other carers who are in a similar position. Mind says peer support groups can help people connect with others and feel a sense of belonging.

The Alzheimer Society of BC and Yukon, describing its groups for families affected by dementia, calls them a place to exchange information, support and friendship with others. The Alzheimer Society of BC and Yukon says the emphasis in those groups is on input from all members, drawing on personal experience rather than expert or professional knowledge. Alzheimer's Society in the UK adds that support groups can also be a good source of information on what services are available in your area and how to reach them.

Ask the people already around you

MedlinePlus Magazine notes that your own doctor or local community services may be able to suggest a group nearby. Alzheimer's Society in the UK suggests asking local carers' services or your own doctor what is available. You can ask your own doctor about groups, even as a passing question at an appointment you already have.

Go at your own pace

Mind says it is up to you how much you share, and suggests giving yourself time, since you might not share anything at first.

If a group isn't right, try another

Mind notes that although many people find group support helpful, not everyone does, and says that if a group isn't helping you can try something else, including a different group or community if you don't feel understood. The Alzheimer Society of BC and Yukon says that support groups are not for everyone in a caring role, and that some people don't find group discussion helpful and prefer other kinds of help, such as one-to-one support or professional assistance.

Talk one to one with a professional

A group is one route; talking one to one is another. The Alzheimer Society of Canada says your family doctor may also know of counselling resources in your community. Whether or not a group suits you, your own health and how caring is affecting you are worth raising with your own doctor.